Weird relief from the winter blahs

I don’t know if it’s the stress from the upcoming election or what, but my usual S.A.D. that shows up each fall when it becomes colder and darker has lasted longer this time. I take a supplement called Sam-e and I use a full spectrum light box, but it took me a few weeks to feel anywhere near normal. (Note: for those who take antidepressants, you can’t use Sam-e. In that case, try 5-HTP).

It’s hard to find joy when you’re feeling flat and emotionless. I also get almost agoraphobic and more introverted, which isn’t good. I was doing my usual self-help practices to snap myself out of the doldrums and wasn’t having a lot of luck.

Out of the blue, my sister emailed me some files she was getting ready to purge. They were from 2006, when we were doing family “dares”. I should tell you that I have a family that is usually up for anything, and we have a strange sense of humor that not everyone gets. For example, my daughter saw a picture of Bella Hadid wearing some kind of black leather get-up. Being the fashionista my daughter is, she made a similar outfit out of trash bags and jokingly asked what we thought.

Not to be outdone, I wrapped my parents up in trash bags and sent the picture to my daughter. This started a chain of trash bag fashion between all of us; my two sisters, their husbands, my other daughters, my sister’s kids, and me. We all spent the day crafting garbage bags into specific looks and emailing them to the group, and it was one of the most fun days any of us had.

But let me get back to the dares. Nearly 20 years ago, my sisters and I decided we would do things that pushed us outside our comfort zones. My parents also took part. We came up with a list of “dares”, like going somewhere new in our own town that we’d never gone to before or finding art on the internet we wouldn’t usually care about and giving a thoughtful critique, or eating a new food or cuisine. I do remember doing one dare with one of my sisters where we went to a taxidermy museum. My parents went on a tour of historical houses. I went inside one of the local Christian Science Reading Rooms. The idea was to do something we wouldn’t normally do. We all had to write up a short report, with pictures if appropriate, and email that report to the rest of the family.

I was an art major years ago at community college, and enjoyed painting copies of Pre-Raphaelite works. I chose a piece of modern art that I couldn’t have cared less about, and yet after the experience I came to appreciate the brilliance of different types of artists. Here is a snippet from the one I did so many years ago:

Willie Cole. (American, born 1955). Domestic I.D. IV. 1992. Steam iron scorch and pencil on paper, mounted in recycled wooden window frame.

“This art piece is displayed in the Museum of Modern Art in NY. I was clicking on pictures and I saw this one and thought, ‘Oh, how stupid.’ When I read that they were scorch marks made from steam irons I actually giggled. I had no idea that irons had different designs in them. It’s an artist’s job to see flow and design and something new in ordinary things. An artist sees like a child sees. I wanted to meet Willie Cole because suddenly I saw him as brilliant and innocent all at once – an initiate who could find something profound in a bland, domestic tool. In the middle row, the farthest right image, I saw the plunging neckline of a woman wearing a necklace. Her skin is glowing as if the sun broke through and we’re catching her right before she spontaneously combusts. In the top row, the furthest left, it’s a thong sandal worn by an Asian woman who’s had her feet bound. Directly below that one shows someone who has had beads implanted beneath the skin in some kind of tribal ritual.”

I asked my sister if she and her husband would want to start up family dares again, and I asked my kids if they would do it too. Maybe even my niece and her fiancé. So far, everyone seems interested and just like that – my depression lifted.

It turns out all I needed to raise my vibration was a sense of connection with the people I love the most, along with a dash of fun and adventure. If you find yourself feeling blah this time of year like so many others, you’re welcome to steal this idea. Half the fun is coming up with interesting challenges that are inexpensive and reasonably simple to do. If you do decide to do this, email and tell me what you did! I read every email, and I always answer.